Sometimes I’m amazed at how quickly the days fly on by….especially when I’m on break. It’s been so good to catch up on some things and not feel like the days are so packed, and I’ve been really thankful for that. But today, well, I woke up feeling like I just hadn’t accomplished quite as much as I should have and was concerned because the break is just about over for me.
Sometimes no matter how much I check off my list, it feels like it’s not quite enough. Kind of like there are so many looming tasks that it’s tough to put a dent in it. And it’s funny how things can multiply. Like for instance, I started to vacuum, and my trusty 20 year old ORECK vacuum started okay…..but then powered off. Uh-Oh. So, add to list, the what ended up being an hour job to fix the belt (because it turned out it wasn’t just the belt. It was the bearings, etc.) But I kept thinking I needed to be thankful that the cleaner even got fixed, not bemoan the hour (and 3 youtube videos) it took to fix it. Turns out, the neglected vacuum needed a good cleaning, a new belt, and a little TLC. It also turns out, that like the vacuum, I needed a little readjustment of my heart as well. Spending an hour fixing the vacuum gave me some much needed ‘think time’ to pray through some things and readjust.
Sometimes I think God uses interruptions to help us see that it’s often not as much about the ‘what’ we do, as it is about the ‘how’. The most important parts of my day were definitely not the things on the to do list. They were the conversations had that I hadn’t planned on, the little things like literally stopping and smelling the roses on my way in to Aldi. The helping a girl get the quarter out from the cart while her Dad waited for her in the parking lot. Yeah, the important things were the little things like laughing really hard with Tanner because yours truly was actually winning the March Madness Bracket. (Trust me, that IS funny!) It was making an extra pot of coffee for my son, writing a note to a friend, and taking some stuff to Good Will. It was Tanner and I running outside when the sky looked like there might be a rainbow. And do you know what? There was! Yeah, the list stuff gets done…but maybe it’s the how…the awareness that God is in it all…that can make all the difference in the motivation to look for the things that are so not on the list..
So, here, now, I’m thankful for time. Time well spent, and even time not. Because the “not” can remind me that I have a choice and free will with how I choose to spend my days. I’d venture to say that we sure enjoy the days that we spend well, more than the ones wasted. And wasted is a relative term. Like I said, some of the most important things ‘accomplished’ in my day would never hit the to-do list.
So if you, like me, find yourself sometimes feeling a rush of being/doing ‘not enough’, well, I encourage you to step back….or God might just send a broken vacuum your way to help you readjust a “Badditude” to Gratitude. I don’t pretend to know how much or how little is orchestrated by God, but I do know that I kind of smirked and smiled a bit in the whole vacuum thing. Because after thinking the vacuum was repaired, I turned it on and it was not “Voila!”, it was….silent. Ugh. No power. And I tried to squelch down the badditude temptation and thought, well, I tried, but the motor must be gone. So I decided I might bring it to the vacuum dealer to use for parts…and then, as I went to unplug it, I clumsily lost my grip of the handle and it dropped. Oops. But no, maybe it wasn’t an ‘Oops’ because as soon as it banged on the floor, the motor cut on and filled the room with that sound I have heard for 20 years. Ha. Grace abounds.
And maybe that’s just what it is. Maybe sometimes, I’m a little like a vacuum and need a wake up call like a clunk on the head that wakes me up to be thankful for what is rather than bemoan what isn’t. Am so learning that. L E A R Ning. Not there yet. But on this Thankful Thursday, am thankful for a whole lot of things that would never make my list…and they include inconveniences like broken vacuums, interruptions at the store, and a little think time. I want to always be willing to show up to run outside and look at a rainbow with my son and smell the roses on display at Aldi. I even want to be willing to fix the broken things and realize that nothing is perfect, but brokenness can be a beautiful reminder of the God who always takes the time to meet us where we are with our brokenness and shortfalls and hurts that would never make our lists. He’s available at a moment’s notice, and loves us right in the middle of the mess, and might use things that we would never choose to draw us nearer to Him.
Blessings to You and Yours on this Thankful Thursday on a Friday Morning~
“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”