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How we live today so matters for their tomorrows.

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I so enjoyed watching the interaction of these two birds this morning. Yes, believe it or not, there are two birds in this photo. It’s tough to tell, but the female (who is moving so very fast that she is barely visible…just a blur…) is rocking the feeder a bit…and the male seems to be ducking for cover.

Kinda funny.  And oh so familiar!

In our homes, we women can tend to flit and fly about a bit in a flurry of function. Yep…flitting and flying around making sure that our nest is set and our little birds are fed, fit and ready to face the world. We flit and fly and function.

And oftentimes, the male, the very present and attempting to be-in-there-with-it-all-male, is ….ducking for cover. Yikes. He might need cover from words of what we need to flit about next. Or words of what should’ve been flit over yesterday. Or words of where we’ll be flitting tomorrow. Or maybe he’s in a flurry of what his part in all this flitting about should be according to the head flitter.

Yeah, the moment of watching the birds brought a grin to my face, and a cringe to my heart.  It was a bit too familiar.

I don’t consider myself a nagger by any means. (Only because I’ve learned from experience that has zero effect.  Correction. Zero effect in a positive way. It def has an effect…the opposite of what I’d hope for.) But I’m definitely a flitter…one who’s rushing around trying to get stuff done. Sometimes I flit in a flurry with people in my wake ducking for cover…just like my poor little purple finch friend.

Yesterday, I read a quote that made me pause and remember and simplify this whole marriage thing in my  mind a bit.  Here goes:  “Let the wife make the husband glad to come home, and let him make her sorry to see him leave.” (Martin Luther…yeah, him!)  Yep. Pretty plain and simple. Pretty profound at the same time. And it made me stop and think about how getting back to simple basics is so important.

And I remember as a young bride and young mom literally running or rushing to the door to welcome my man home. The kids followed suit to welcome their Daddy.  And when people came to our house, we’d have lots of little ones filing out to welcome whoever it was to our home.  They followed the lead… Lots of years later,  when Buddy comes home, there’s still a welcome, but rarely the same, “WELCOME HOME” that he used to get way back when.  Back then, a lot of the ‘flitting about’ included moving toward and catering to that all-important relationship. The focus was so on family…not just on family function and a flurry of activities on the to do list.

Here’s another little lesson from the birds…I’m pretty amazed by how often birds come two by two to the bird feeder. Mourning doves,chickadees,  and cardinals all regularly come two by two. They linger, feed, and interact. It’s a beautiful sight to see….and it reminds me that being together, side by side, in the ordinary stuff of life matters. Spending time together is crucial. No matter how invincible we think we are, or our marriage is, couples need time together.  Not coming together just to function. Coming together to have fun and be and rest…(and let the other bird rest as well…) Like the birds, coming two by two  is a key to a good solid relationship.

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One more thought on the quote by Martin Luther. It states that we take ownership of our tasks…not that of the spouse. (Ouch.) Let the wife make his husband be happy he’s home. (That takes her looking at his needs and thinking of him.) Let the husband make his wife sorry to see him leave. (That takes him looking at her needs and thinking of her…) Yeah, this is not about telling the other spouse what to do. It’s about taking ownership of giving. Giving, giving, giving seems to be key in any good relationship. Not necessarily giving stuff. Giving time. Credit. An attentive ear. A good laugh. A encouraging word. Giving grace. Giving a little breathing room.

 

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Like the birds, we’ve got lots of necessary things to do in a day. And yes, our nests require upkeep and job delegation. But it’s important to know that the flitting and function is there for the family…not the family there for the flitting and function. Kind of an important distinction, I’d say (to myself).  Because, we don’t want to leave our partners ducking for cover while we’re flurrying through our day.  Just a few thoughts and reminders from my friendly little finch friends.

Blessings~

Heather

“Be completely humble and gentle; Be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the spirit through the bond of peace.” 

Ephesians 4: 2-3

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Silent Sunday

Tonight, as I was taking photos at a rehearsal dinner, it started to rain…and the wedding party quickly moved to shelter. Of course. I mean, that’s what you do when it rains, right?

Well… most times yeah. But I was standing under a huge oak and  took the opportunity to linger a bit and take some photos of the gently falling rain while everyone got situated a bit. The few minutes of gazing at the drops through the camera lens were pretty cool.

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a pond somewhere in western North Carolina, June 30, 2017

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And then I went to take more photos of the wedding party rehearsing for the sweet day tomorrow, but my camera kept turning to this little guy. He was having quite the time playing in the rain. And his mom smiled as he played in the water, for it wasn’t a cold rain, it was a gentle summer rain, and it was the perfect thing to keep him occupied as adults did their adult things…

 

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He danced around and looked up and smiled quite a bit. Couldn’t help but smile watching this little guy. And then he raised his little hands to feel the rain. Sweet. And it brought me back to times of letting my kids play in the rain. Lots of sweet memories there.

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And this little girl in flip flops twirled and danced as well. Yeah, the rain was a good diversion for sure.

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I love the quote, “Some people feel the rain. Others just get wet…” (Bob Marley).  Yeah, these little ones felt the rain.  They enjoyed the rain…and made the most of it. Funny how children can sometimes lead the way. Adults weren’t bemoaning the rain quite as much as these little ones brought smiles to their faces. Yeah, a little rain didn’t hurt the wedding rehearsal. Nope, not a bit.

“Life isn’t about waiting for the storms to pass. It’s about learning to dance in the rain.”  (V. Greene)

I think I’d have to agree.

Now, off to editing more photos. (But I think the rain ones were my favorite….)

Blessings~

Heather

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Giving myself 15 minutes to write what I’m thankful for for this week…so here goes…

Thankful for Sky.  For wide open spaces. For sunsets and endings to days.  Good to have endings so that we can have beginnings.

Thankful for sons on the way home from different places & different ventures, a daughter on the way out to see family, and me sitting right there in the middle of the comings and goings being thankful that I get to see them as they come and they go. Thankful they have places to go to do their thing, but that there’s a magnet of family to come home to.

Thankful for friends. For truths shared. Encouragement. Laughter. Gut-level prayers sent up, and the ‘you’re not in this alone’ reality that sweet friendship brings to both sides. Internal perspective has a way of changing external views. So very thankful for friendships that help me see things through the lens of faith.

Thankful for stark realities of death that lead to beautiful awareness of LIFE and the gift of each day. That the darkest moments one one’s life can lead to wake up calls of living well in so many more lives. Thankful that the Bible speaks of deep gut-level HOPE that doesn’t let us or loved ones go in times of loss.

Thankful for stupid videos that my son shares that make me laugh like crazy….and make me admit that his quite goofy sense of humor may have come from someone.

Thankful for evening walks after the rain.

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Thankful for triple chocolate gelato (almost as good as the pistachio)…and for a son who eats a lot of it so that his mom isn’t tempted to eat more. Thankful for the memory of a year ago…eating my first gelato on a small island in the Archipelagos of Sweden…and for the son who was determined to help me check some things off of my bucket list.

Thankful for a ridiculously cluttered garage that is becoming less cluttered, and for the many moments in the past week of finding lost treasures of notes from kids, family photos, and little reminders of different stages of our family. Thankful for the laughter and cleansing tears shed in the reminders, and for the laughter and smiles from my kids as they get unexpected photos popping up on their phones with “remember when” messages from a mom who is trying hard to hold things loosely, but hold tightly to the things that matter.

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Bookmark Josh made years and years ago 🙂

Thankful for a misty rain that watered the plants that I had forgotten to.

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Morning Glory

Thankful that God’s mercy is new every morning.

Thankful for spinakopita and Greek salad and lunch with coworkers.

Thankful for time with my girl of laughter and talking and accomplishing daily tasks as a team…always feels so good to be part of a team working towards a common goal. Thankful for her feisty self that has a heart of compassion and wisdom underneath all that beauty and spunk.

Thankful for calls from sons…and catching up and laughing and connecting…and the little things that remind me that even though they are now men with lives of their own, they are so the same little guys with the same eyes that I looked into when they were young.

Thankful for my husband’s determination to provide for our family, and for the humility and wisdom to keep pressing on when things aren’t anywhere near easy street.

Thankful for walks with friends and wise decisions to meet at the River Trail instead of DQ.

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Carolina Thread Trail

Thankful for good reports from family members and the reminder that we all aren’t quite as invincible as we may think.

Thankful for new books to read and the desire to learn and grow. For me from the library, and for my youngest from Young Life youth leader. Yep Thankful for people investing in my kids big time.

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Thankful for quiet mornings, coffee, and for the missions and checklists for the day.

Thankful for “Thankful Thursday” posts and for the way being grateful for the little things has a way of empowering me to tackle the big things/tasks of the day.

Welp, my 15 minutes (stretched to 20 actually) are up.  Thankful for those who take the time to read these words, and for the many connections we all have. Thankful for words that bridge connections.  ❤

Hope your day is full of many, many…. Blessings ~

Heather

 

“..give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”  I Thessalonians 5:18

Thankful Thursday

 

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Thistles on the River Trail

Wordless Wednesday

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I walked out of the house this morning and saw this…a leaf hanging by a thread. Literally.  And I smiled. Cause I get it. I know a bit about what that feels like. Am guessing we have all had our times of feeling like we’re ‘hanging by a thread’.  And the smile came because I also have a favorite verse as a result. “The eternal God is your refuge and underneath are the everlasting arms.” (Deuteronomy 33: 27a)

Underneath are the everlasting arms.  Like a Dad catching His child when he or she jumps in the pool. Like a fireman rescuing a child from a burning building.  Like a God who knows where we are and what we need more than we do, before we do, and anticipates where we’ll land or fall. Yes. Underneath are the everlasting arms. Love that. Good to know.

Blessings ~

Heather

P.S.  My maiden name is ‘Hangen’, so growing up, one of my favorite go-to answers for how I’m doing was to say, “hangen in there 😉 ”  And through the years have appreciated the truth of just being able to persevere, to hang tough, to ‘hang in there’ when times get difficult. There’s so much value in not giving in or giving up.  Even if the end isn’t what we hope, the process can sure strengthen our hearts and minds and muscles. Just a thought.  Yeah, hang in there 🙂

“And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope.”

Romans 5:3,4

P.P.S.  Gotta add a cool verse I read this morning about falling…It’s Jude 24, 25 and was one of my favorites years ago. To him who is able to keep you from stumbling (some translations say ‘falling’ 🙂 )  and to present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy— 25 to the only God our Savior be glory, majesty, power and authority, through Jesus Christ our Lord, before all ages, now and forevermore! Amen.

Amen.

 

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Boiling Springs, NC  June 24th, 2017

“Faith is to believe what you do not see…the reward of faith is to see what you believe.”

~Saint Augustine

 

Silent Sunday

 

 

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So I love the saying, “Bloom where you’re planted.”

But my thought today?  It is simply ‘Grow where ya land…’  And this rogue Sunflower mustering up one little petal as it takes root in the gutter and reaches toward the sun…well the visual sums it up pretty perfectly. And it made me smile and inspired me and even gave me a little courage. I could write volumes on my thoughts…but will spare you of the unabridged version today…

Yeah, sometimes, we’ve just gotta grow where we land.

Oh, and hopefully we don’t land in too many gutters… just saying.  But if we ever do, well, just think on my sweet little pathetic but tenacious sunflower. Bloom…and if ya can’t bloom, well, just be sure to  g r O W 🙂

Blessings,

Heather

P.S. yeah, I know it’s time to clean the gutters 🙂

 

 

Weekly Photo Challenge~ Drifter

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